In short

To say A and B between two nouns, hang a linker on the FIRST noun: 와/과 (neutral, written), 하고 (everyday spoken), or (이)랑 (casual). Use (이)나 for A or B. And for X’s Y, the possessive is 의 - but in speech Koreans mostly just put the two nouns side by side: 친구 집 (a friend’s house), no particle at all.

The rule

Step 1 - Linkers join NOUNS, not sentences

Noun + 와/과 (또는 하고 / (이)랑) + Noun. These three all mean and, and they attach with no space to the first noun. Do not reach for 그리고 (geurigo) here - 그리고 joins whole sentences, never two nouns. *커피 그리고 차 is not how you say coffee and tea; 커피와 차 is.

Step 2 - Pick the register, then pick the allomorph

The three and-words differ only in feel:

• 와/과 - neutral, the written and formal choice. It has two shapes: 와 after a vowel, 과 after a 받침.
• 하고 - the everyday spoken word. One shape only, after any noun: 커피하고, 빵하고. When in doubt, this one is always safe.
• (이)랑 - casual, friendly. 랑 after a vowel, 이랑 after a 받침.

The allomorph is chosen by the noun the linker sits on. 커피 ends in a vowel, so 커피와; 빵 ends in a 받침, so 빵과.

Step 3 - (이)나 = or

Same slot, same allomorph rule, different meaning: (이)나 offers a choice between nouns. 나 after a vowel, 이나 after a 받침.

• 커피나 차 주세요. (Keopina cha juseyo.) - Give me coffee or tea.
• 물이나 주스 있어요? (Murina juseu isseoyo?) - Do you have water or juice?

(To say or between whole clauses you need -거나 - a different tool, in lesson 23.)

Step 4 - 와/과 also means with after certain verbs

A small group of predicates is inherently two-sided, and they take 과/와 (or 하고 / (이)랑) instead of the object 을/를: 같다 (be the same), 다르다 (be different), 비슷하다 (be similar), 결혼하다 (marry). Think of it as the same AS, different FROM. 만나다 (meet) fits the same with pattern - 친구와 만나요 (meet with a friend) - but, unlike the others, it also takes a plain object, so 친구를 만나요 is equally correct.

• 친구하고 같이 영화를 봤어요. (Chinguhago gachi yeonghwareul bwasseoyo.) - I watched a movie with a friend. (같이 = together, often paired with the with noun.)
• 그 사람과 결혼해요. (Geu saramgwa gyeolhonhaeyo.) - [She] is marrying that person.

Step 5 - Possession: 의, and why you rarely say it

X의 Y = X’s Y: 한국의 문화 (Hangugui munhwa, Korea’s culture). The particle is written 의, and the standard allows it to be read either [의] or [에] (e) - in practice almost everyone says [에]. In real speech, though, Koreans usually drop it and just stack the two nouns:

친구 집 (a friend’s house), 학교 앞 (in front of the school), 한국 사람 (a Korean person).

Keep 의 for careful or written possession (한국의 미래, Korea’s future), and drop it in everyday talk. Note that a fixed compound like 한국 사람 never takes 의 at all.

Step 6 - The pronoun contractions, and 우리 집

Pronoun + 의 contracts, obligatorily in normal speech:

나의 -> 내, 저의 -> 제, 너의 -> 네.

So my friend (polite) is 제 친구 (je chingu), not 저의 친구. One idiom overrides all of this: for anything the speaker belongs to - home, family and country, and equally a workplace, school, team or neighbourhood - Korean says 우리 (our), not 내/제: 우리 집 (my/our house), 우리 엄마, 우리나라 (one word - it is a single dictionary entry). In polite speech the humble 저희 fills exactly the same slot (see lesson 04). *나의 집 sounds off.

Forms & patterns

The four linkers - allomorph by environment:

Verbs that take 과/와 (the with / comparison pattern):

Possessive 의 vs the bare noun+noun (the spoken norm):

Pronoun + 의 contractions (obligatory):

Examples

Common mistakes

• 커피과 차 (keopigwa cha) -> 커피와 차 (keopiwa cha) - 커피 ends in a vowel, so the linker is 와, not 과.
• 빵와 우유 (ppangwa uyu) -> 빵과 우유 (ppanggwa uyu) - 빵 ends in a 받침 (ㅇ), so it must be 과. Same split runs through (이)랑 and (이)나: 빵이랑, 빵이나.
• 커피 그리고 차 주세요. (Keopi geurigo cha juseyo.) -> 커피와 차 주세요. (Keopiwa cha juseyo.) - 그리고 links sentences, not nouns. Between two nouns use 와/과, 하고 or (이)랑.
• 그 사람을 결혼해요. (Geu sarameul gyeolhonhaeyo.) -> 그 사람과 결혼해요. (Geu saramgwa gyeolhonhaeyo.) - 결혼하다, 같다 and 다르다 pair with 과/와, never with the object 을/를 (결혼하다 takes no object at all).
• 나의 집이 좋아요. (Naui jibi joayo.) -> 우리 집이 좋아요. (Uri jibi joayo.) - For anything you belong to - home, family, country, workplace, school - Korean uses 우리 (our), not 나의/내: 우리 집, 우리 엄마, 우리나라.

Tips

• A register ladder for and: 와/과 > 하고 > (이)랑. 와/과 is the tidy written pair (with allomorphs); 하고 is the one-shape workhorse of everyday speech; (이)랑 is what you use with close friends. If you are unsure, 하고 never sounds wrong.
• Look at the FIRST noun to choose the allomorph. 와/과, (이)랑 and (이)나 all agree with the noun they attach to, not the second one: 커피와 빵 but 빵과 커피, 물이나 커피 but 커피나 물.
• 의 is written but mostly silent. It is normally pronounced [에] (e) - the standard permits both [의] and [에] - and in speech it usually disappears entirely: 친구 집, 학교 앞, 한국 사람. Save it for careful or written possession, and remember the three contractions 내 / 제 / 네.
• (이)나 = or, (이)랑 = and. They attach identically, so the only thing to track is the meaning: 커피나 차 = pick one; 커피랑 차 = both together.