In short

Japanese demonstratives come in a tidy grid: the first syllable says how far (こ near me, そ near you, あ far from both, ど the question word), and the rest of the word says what kind of word it is (a thing, a place, a direction, a kind, a manner). Learn one row and you get four words for free. The one trap: これ (kore) stands alone as “this thing”, while この (kono) must be glued to a noun.

The rule

English splits the world in two, “this” and “that”. Japanese splits it in three, plus a question form. That set of four columns times six rows is called こそあど (ko-so-a-do), after the four first syllables.

Step 1 - choose the column (distance).

• こ - near the speaker: in my hand, on my desk, right here.
• そ - near the hearer: in your hand, next to you, on your side of the table.
• あ - far from both of us: over there, across the room, out the window.
• ど - the question: “which / where / what kind / how”.

The そ column is what English speakers usually get wrong. English “that” covers both そ and あ, so the habit is to reach for あれ (are) for anything not in your own hand. Ask instead: is it closer to the person I am talking to? If yes, it is そ.

Step 2 - choose the row (what kind of word you need).

• これ／それ／あれ／どれ (kore / sore / are / dore) - a pronoun, a whole noun phrase by itself: これは本です。 (Kore wa hon desu.) - “This is a book.” Never put a noun after it.
• この／その／あの／どの + Noun (kono / sono / ano / dono) - an attributive; it is a modifier and is never used alone. It always has a noun attached: この本 (kono hon) “this book”, どの人 (dono hito) “which person”.
• ここ／そこ／あそこ／どこ (koko / soko / asoko / doko) - places: ここは教室です。 (Koko wa kyōshitsu desu.) - “This place is a classroom.” Note the irregular あそこ (asoko), not あこ.
• こちら／そちら／あちら／どちら (kochira / sochira / achira / dochira) - literally directions (“this way”), but also the polite substitute for both the place words and the thing words, and the polite way to refer to a person: こちらは田中さんです。 (Kochira wa Tanaka-san desu.) - “This is Mr. Tanaka.”
• こんな／そんな／あんな／どんな + Noun (konna / sonna / anna / donna) - “this kind of”; like この, it needs a noun after it: どんな映画ですか。 (Donna eiga desu ka.) - “What kind of film is it?”
• こう／そう／ああ／どう (kō / sō / ā / dō) - manner, “in this way / like that / how”; these are adverbs and attach to a verb or to です: どうですか。 (Dō desu ka.) - “How is it?” Note the irregular ああ (ā), not あう.

Step 3 - use そ and あ for things that are not in the room at all. Distance also works on what has been said. When you refer back to something the other person just mentioned - a story, a plan, a name you have only heard from them - use そ: その話 (sono hanashi) “that story of yours”. When you refer to something both of you already know from shared experience, use あ: あの店 (ano mise) “that shop we both know”. This is the anaphoric use, and it is extremely common in conversation.

The canonical A1 exchange puts columns and rows together. You hold something up and ask what it is, and the other person answers about that same object - which, from where they are standing, is the thing in your hand:

• これは何ですか。 (Kore wa nan desu ka.) - asking about what is in my hand.
• それは本です。 (Sore wa hon desu.) - answering about what is in your hand.

The two swap from each speaker’s point of view. If you ask それは何ですか。, the natural answer is これは本です。 - the same object, a different speaker.

One thing this lesson deliberately does not cover: the pro-form の, which lets you say 赤いの (akai no) “the red one” without repeating the noun. It belongs with the other uses of の in the particles lesson.

Forms & patterns

The full grid. Read across for one word type, down for one distance:

How each row plugs into a sentence:

The こちら row has a casual spoken counterpart worth recognizing early:

Examples

Common mistakes

• これ本は新しいです。 (Kore hon wa atarashii desu.) -> この本は新しいです。 (Kono hon wa atarashii desu.) - Before a noun you must use この, not これ. これ is already a complete noun phrase meaning “this thing”, so it cannot modify another noun.
• このは何ですか。 (Kono wa nan desu ka.) -> これは何ですか。 (Kore wa nan desu ka.) - The mirror image of the first error. この is a modifier and can never stand alone; with no noun after it, you need これ.
• あれは何ですか。 (Are wa nan desu ka.) said about the object in the listener’s hand -> それは何ですか。 (Sore wa nan desu ka.) - Anything close to the person you are speaking to is そ. Save あ for things far from both of you.
• どんなですか。 (Donna desu ka.) -> どうですか。 (Dō desu ka.) - どんな needs a noun after it (どんな映画), exactly like この. With no noun, the manner word どう is the one you want.
• あの話は本当ですか。 (Ano hanashi wa hontō desu ka.) about something you only just heard from the other person -> その話は本当ですか。 (Sono hanashi wa hontō desu ka.) - あ refers back only to what both speakers already know. Something that exists only in the other person’s words is そ.

Tips

• Memorise the columns first, the rows second. こ = close to me, そ = by you, あ = away from both, ど = the question. Once that sticks, a new row (こんな／そんな／あんな／どんな) costs you one word, not four.
• English has two, Japanese has three. English “that” is doing double duty for そ and あ, which is why learners overuse あれ. The test is not “is it far from me” but “is it near my listener”.
• そう is the workhorse of the whole family. そうです (Sō desu, “that’s right”), そうですか (Sō desu ka, “is that so”), and そうですね (Sō desu ne, “let me see / that’s true”) are among the most frequent phrases in spoken Japanese. Learning them now buys you a lot of conversation.
• こちら is the polite escape hatch. In a shop, an office, or an introduction, こちら／そちら／あちら／どちら replaces both the place words and the thing words, and どちら politely replaces どこ (“where”) and, when the choice is between two options, どれ (“which one”). For three or more options どれ stays. Reach for the ちら row whenever the situation feels formal.