In short

Instead of repeating a noun, Italian puts a tiny unstressed pronoun in front of the verb: Conosci Marco? Sì, lo conosco. There are two sets - direct (lo, la, li, le: him, her, them) and indirect (gli, le: to him, to her) - and they differ only in the third person. Everything else (mi, ti, ci, vi) is the same in both columns.

The rule

An unstressed pronoun (pronome atono) is not a word you stress or pause on - it leans on the verb like a prefix. That is why it goes before the verb, not after it as in English.

• Step 1 - Find out what the verb does with the person. Does the verb reach them directly, with no preposition (vedere qualcuno, aspettare qualcuno)? That is a direct object. Or does it reach them through a (telefonare a qualcuno, scrivere a qualcuno)? That is an indirect object.
• Step 2 - Pick the pronoun from the right column. Direct: mi, ti, lo, la, ci, vi, li, le. Indirect: mi, ti, gli, le, ci, vi, gli. Only lui, lei and loro force you to choose; the rest are identical.
• Step 3 - Put it in front of the conjugated verb. Lo vedo. Gli scrivo. With non, the negation stays outside: Non lo vedo, non gli scrivo.
• Step 4 - Elide if you can. Only lo and la shrink to l’ before a vowel or h: L’aspetto, L’ho visto. li, le and gli never elide.

Ignore the English preposition - it lies

English “listen to him” has a preposition and Italian does not; English “phone him” has none and Italian does. The only thing that counts is what the Italian verb does.

Direct (no a): vedere, guardare, ascoltare, aspettare, cercare, chiamare, incontrare, aiutare, conoscere, seguire, ringraziare, salutare, pagare, invitare. -> L’ascolto (I listen to him), La chiamo (I call her).

Indirect (with a): telefonare a, scrivere a, parlare a, dire a, chiedere a, rispondere a, dare a, offrire a, regalare a, mandare a, spiegare a. -> Gli telefono (I phone him), Le rispondo (I answer her).

Where the pronoun sits

Before a conjugated verb it is a separate word: Ti chiamo stasera. But it attaches to the end of an infinitive (which drops its final -e) and of an informal imperative: vedere -> vederlo, dire -> dirgli, Guarda! -> Guardalo!

With modale + infinito you get two placements, both fully correct - just never both at once, and never in the middle: Lo voglio vedere = Voglio vederlo.

The imperatives da’, di’, fa’, sta’, va’ double the consonant of whatever attaches: dammi, dimmi, fallo, vacci - except before gli, which never doubles: digli, dagli. The imperative itself is step 24; with the polite Lei the pronoun goes back in front (Mi dica), which belongs to step 38.

Stay in the simple tenses for now. When a direct lo/la/li/le comes before a compound tense the past participle has to agree with it (Li ho visti), and pronouns also combine into single words like glielo and me ne - both of those are step 30.

The stressed forms (i pronomi tonici)

The atoni cannot be stressed, so when you need emphasis, contrast, or a preposition, Italian swaps in the heavy forms: me, te, lui, lei, noi, voi, loro. They go after the verb.

• After any preposition: con me, per te, da lui, secondo noi. (senza, dopo, prima, sopra, sotto insert di: senza di te.)
• For contrast or emphasis: Cercano me, non te. Compare the neutral Mi cercano.
• For an indirect object, the heavy form keeps its a: Parlo a lui, never Parlo lui. The a that disappeared inside gli comes back.
• After anche, solo, neanche: Anche lui viene.

Note that me and te are the forms after a preposition - con io, per tu do not exist.

One caution about loro

The strictly correct indirect plural is loro, placed after the verb: Parlo loro. Nobody says this outside formal writing. Modern spoken Italian uses gli for to them as well: Gli parlo. Use gli and recognise loro.

Forms & patterns

The two columns side by side - the whole lesson is the four cells that differ:

Unstressed vs stressed - same meaning, different weight:

Position, by verb form:

Elision - only two forms shrink:

Because le and gli never elide, le ho scritto can only be I wrote to her - the elided l’ho is always a direct lo/la.

Examples

Common mistakes

• Vedo lo domani -> Lo vedo domani - an unstressed pronoun never follows a conjugated verb. If you really want it after the verb, you need the stressed form: Vedo lui domani.
• Le ascolto (meaning “I listen to her”) -> L’ascolto - ascoltare takes a direct object in Italian. The English “to” is not there in ascoltare qualcuno, so the pronoun is la, not le. Same trap with aspettare (wait for), guardare (look at), cercare (look for).
• Telefono lo stasera -> Gli telefono stasera - telefonare reaches the person through a (telefonare a Marco), so it needs the indirect gli, even though English “phone him” looks direct.
• Lo ho comprato -> L’ho comprato - before a vowel or h, lo and la must elide. (li and le must not: Li ho comprati.)
• Devo lo finire -> Lo devo finire / Devo finirlo - the pronoun cannot sit between the modal and the infinitive. It climbs in front of the modal or attaches to the infinitive - one or the other, never both.

Tips

• Only the third person is real work. mi, ti, ci, vi are identical in both columns, so four cells carry the whole system: lui = lo/gli, lei = la/le. Learn them as two pairs and you are done.
• The “a” test beats translation. Say the sentence with a name: Telefono a Marco -> there is an a -> indirect -> gli. Aspetto Marco -> no a -> direct -> lo. Never reason from the English preposition; it disagrees with Italian about half the time.
• Atono = leaning, tonico = pointing. If you could bang the table on the word (“I’m looking for you, not him”), you need the heavy form: Cerco te. If it is just information, use the light one: Ti cerco.
• le has a twin. le is both the direct them (feminine) and the indirect to her - the verb tells you which: Le vedo = I see them (women); Le parlo = I speak to her.